On Loyalty
by bluemeanies
Summary: *CHAPTER 1* Snape and Pettigrew are stuck in detention, *CHAPTER 2* A rat and a snake walk into a bar *CHAPTER 3* Said snake and said rat are back again, but who can they trust. Not slash, rather what might happen if they talked to eachother
1. On Loyalty

On Loyalty  
  
AN: Ok, I know those of you who read my chapter fics. well Terry Boot has a bad case of the Slytherin flu, and I'm having inspiration problems on how to get to chapter eight of Knockturn alley, which I know what happens in because it is the last chapter of the fic (but it will have continuation, and may not reach a plot wise but a symbol wise sense of closure) without coming up with a chapter seven that gets me there. Meanwhile, back on the farm, I have a rather ironic little vignette on a discussion between the character everyone loves to hate and the character everyone hates to love. Remember, this is before the word traitor meant anything to either of them.  
  
Disclaimer: Rowling and associates have all legal, copyright and monetary rights. Therefore, while I would like to accept your check, I am afraid I cannot.  
  
  
  
***  
  
"Mr. Pettigrew, how many times must you be reminded that students are not supposed to visit the kitchens. What is it, the third time this year?" A furious Minerva McGonagall was dragging Peter Pettigrew through the halls, after having surprised him by walking into the kitchens while taking a bite of some rather rich German chocolate cake.  
  
"Ye..eees. Pro..ofessor." Pettigrew muttered.  
  
"And where are your friends? I don't imagine you came down here all by yourself?" Mcgonagall had turned to face him, and was staring down at him with one of her harshest looks.  
  
Peter, out of the corner of his eye, saw a shadow slowly edging along the walls, past the enraged professor and her catch, back to Gryffindor tower. That meant that James, Sirius and Remus would probably make it back to the dorm without being caught if. if he didn't give them away. He steeled himself to face McGonagall, and then said, "Yes, actually, I was just popping down for a snack."  
  
"Really Mr. Pettigrew." Minerva said, raising one eyebrow. Peter just stayed silent. The Professor let out a sigh, "Then, I shall expect to see you in detention. Six O'clock tomorrow afternoon, Filch, the Trophy room, and thirty points from Gryffindor. Really, you boys get into more trouble than all the rest of the house. Now I had better escort you back to your dorm room.  
  
***  
  
Severus Snape snuck stealthily across the school grounds to the Herbology greenhouses. He had been experimenting with a rather dangerous concoction, and he only needed on more ingredient- aconite. And the only place he knew he could find it was in greenhouse two, which he couldn't get into during class hours, too conspicuous. He placed his hand on the doorknob, and opened the door only to discover that this set off several wards. He should have checked, but he had not expected Professor Aphides to not be so thorough as to set them. Hagrid, the gamekeeper, came running to the greenhouses, and caught him before he had a chance to slip back into the castle.  
  
"NOW, JUST WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU"RE GOING." The gamekeeper shouted at him.  
  
"I thought I saw an intruder, so I decided to check on what was happening, but when I got here there was nobody and the wards had gone out." Snape said, knowing he had been caught without a good excuse.  
  
"Uh, huh, Cours' ya were. Shall I tell it to Professor Dumbledore, and 'haps he can find this mysterious intruder." Hagrid said.  
  
"No, I don't think it will be necessary, it was probably nothing." Snape replied.  
  
"Nothing enough to get you detention and forty points from Slytherin, young man. Now don't let me ever catch you out here again." Hagrid said, and then took Severus back to the castle.  
  
***  
  
"What, only you Mr. Pettigrew? Where are Black, Potter and Lupin? I usually get all of you in detention at the same time, now don't I?" Filch said, leering at Peter. "Huh, while we best wait for Mr. Snape to come join us then you had better start polishing the trophies. I do believe they will need a rather thorough polish this time, they seem to have gotten rather dusty."  
  
"You're going to put me in the same room as Snape." Pettigrew shivered.  
  
"You say that like it was a bad thing." A voice sneered from the doorway. "I was told to report here for detention."  
  
"Very good. Now if you would both follow me, I expect to see each of these trophies sparkling, no magic and no fighting, understand?" The two students nodded. "Well, then get started."  
  
For a while, they quietly worked on polishing the trophies, closely supervised by Filch. But Filch had many responsibilities in the castle and eventually left them to catch some third year Ravenclaws who were attempting to exorcise Moaning Myrtle through animal sacrifice.  
  
"So, Pettigrew take the fall for your friends again?" Snape said.  
  
"Go to hell, Snape. Get caught snogging Rebecca Wilkes?" Pettigrew responded.  
  
Ignoring this last comment, Snape continued to pester Peter, "You mean this isn't hell." After a short pause he added. "You know, you owe them nothing. They always get you into trouble. You're better off without them, if you ask me."  
  
At this Peter dropped his rags and yelled at Snape, "There are some things you will never understand, like loyalty!!!!"  
  
Snape just rolled his eyes and went back to working. A few minutes later, he broke his silence, "So you still believe in all those imaginary virtues such as loyalty, Pettigrew."  
  
"Imaginary? Snape, they are things that all good people have. Which means, you of course would never have heard of them." Peter said.  
  
"They are things that cowardly people use to justify their reluctance and to place themselves above those they would rather look down upon, knowing that if they had good reason they would discard these so called virtues before you could snap your fingers." Snape replied.  
  
"Just because you don't have any real virtue doesn't mean everybody else doesn't" Peter said, as he continued polishing the Quidditch cup.  
  
"I act out of the same reasons everyone else does. Intelligent self- interest. I just don't justify it with all these 'principles' Gryffindors create." Snape said, "Survival of the fittest to use a muggle phrase."  
  
"There are too virtues, none of which seem possible for your reptilian heart. We're real friends, something you've probably only read about in books." Peter said.  
  
Snape chuckled at this. "You, my fat little friend, are only friends with them because they protect you your own incompetence, and the big bad boogie man." At this Snape snuck up behind Peter with his wand drawn, and hit Peter with a tickling curse. Peter gasped between his giggles, "James, Help, please."  
  
"See, you're friends with them only because they protect you. Intelligent self interest like everyone else," and then he walked back to his side of the trophy room, picked up his rags, and quietly removed the curse.  
  
"Why you.." Peter said as he got up.  
  
"BOYS I TOLD YOU NOT TO FIGHT IN DETENTION" Filch walked into the room, and Peter quickly went back to the trophies. After a few minutes Filch was again called out of the trophy room, and the boys continued working quietly for a while.  
  
"I don't care what you said, loyalty is real." Peter said, quietly thinking Snape wouldn't hear it.  
  
"Are you sure you don't belong in Hufflepuff? I thought the illusion of choice for Gryffindors was bravery." Snape drawled.  
  
"Are you sure you don't belong in Azkaban? I thought even Slytherins had some conscience." Peter retorted.  
  
"Ah, conscience. All it does is stops you from doing what needs to be done." Snape said airily.  
  
"Sounds like something Sirius might say." Peter muttered.  
  
"Ooooh, did loyal little Peter just say something bad about his friends. I am shocked, positively shocked." Snape said mockingly.  
  
"Can't you leave me alone?"  
  
"Not until I am done polishing." Snape said and went back to his work, whistling the first section of Beethoven's fifth.  
  
"Stop it!!!!" Peter screamed, after the twentieth repetition of the tune.  
  
"Make me." Snape said.  
  
"I guess I am going to have to teach you some consideration for others, Mr. Intelligent Self-Interest." Peter said slowly approaching Snape.  
  
Snape turned around and cast a freezing curse on Peter, preventing him from moving closer, than went back to work. "Consideration for others? Another guise for self-interest. If you are considerate, other people will do things for you. Unfortunately, I don't want anything from you, so there is really no point."  
  
"That is so not so!!!! People do things for others just to be nice. Just because you don't, doesn't mean it doesn't happen." Peter exclaimed.  
  
"Hit too close to home, Peter, did I. You know I'm right, only you're too scared to admit it. What you consider acts of altruism, is really an attempt to please conscience and to get rid of guilt, both of which only exist because people insist on some guiding moral principles. It is really rather transparent when you get rid of your delusions." Snape said, smirking at Peter.  
  
"Guilt is the only thing that keeps us human." Peter said quietly.  
  
Snape's face went white, in shock, then quickly regathered himself and said, "Who told you that?"  
  
"Re..eemus." Peter said, nervously.  
  
"Figures, your morals aren't even your own, you have to rely on others for those. You really are quite pathetic." Snape said.  
  
"Boys, will you please stop talking to each other and get back to work." Professor McGonagall said, from the entrance of the trophy room.  
  
"Professor, he cursed me." Peter said.  
  
"Only to stop him from cursing me, Professor." Snape said.  
  
"I don't care, you boys had better get back to work." She said, then unfroze Peter and stayed until she was certain they wouldn't approach each other for the rest of their detention, then went to her office to grade the fourth year's transfiguration homework.  
  
The boys continued to work, eventually both reaching their last trophy. When Snape had finished with Professor Dumbledore's award for special services to the school, he walked across the room.  
  
"Almost done Pettigrew?"  
  
"Yes, just need to finish this last one."  
  
"Fine, I'll see you tomorrow." Snape said, and then left the trophy room. A few minutes later Peter got up and left, after having finished with Tom Riddle's award for special services to the school. 


	2. The Meaning of the Word 'Traitor'

On Loyalty  
  
Part 2: The meaning of the word 'Traitor'  
  
A/N: This wasn't supposed to have a continuation, but I couldn't help it. This is set later, but it is another conversation between Snape and Pettigrew. It isn't quite as long as the last part. Amanda Swiftgood, thank you. Was repartee the word you were looking for. And exorcising myrtle would be goon fun, don't you think. AniMourner, don't worry, it is kind of not the easiest thing to think about with a slurpee induced brain- freeze.  
  
Ok, so a Rat and a Snake walk into a bar.  
  
Disclaimer: The Rat and the Snake both belong to JKR and associates  
  
  
  
Severus Snape downed another shot of Ogden's Old Firewhisky. It was really nasty stuff, but it helped to stop the nightmares, which was something he desperately needed just now. Ever since he had joined the Death Eaters two years ago, there had been a constant scenes of carnage and blood that he tried hard to forget, but would creep into his dreams with increasing regularity.  
  
"Can I have another?' He asked the bar tender. The bar tender looked at him for a second, seemingly considering whether he should give this man more to drink, then poured him some more. Snape thought the bartender would probably try to take advantage of his drunken state and overcharge him, but he didn't care. He stared at his drink for a while, then brought it up to his lips and swallowed. He was going to ask for yet another, when someone walked in and sat down on the barstool next to him. He turned his face to examine the stranger, and was displeased to see it was Peter Pettigrew, one of the four people he had sincerely hoped never to see again after Hogwarts. Peter didn't look too happy to see him here either.  
  
"So, what is 'Mr. Epitome of all that is good and loyal' doing here of all places?" Snape started.  
  
"Same thing you are, "Mr. I'll Never feel Guilty for anything I do", getting as drunk as possible." Pettigrew responded.  
  
"You really think that of me, don't you, never feeling guilty." Snape said.  
  
"As much as you really think me the epitome of loyalty." Peter responded.  
  
"So we're agreed then, both are complete balderdash." Snape said, then asked the bartender for another shot. The bartender considered for a second, then poured another shot. Peter asked for a butterbeer.  
  
"Drinking sissy drinks, huh Peter." Snape said, fingering his own whisky.  
  
"I happen to like butterbeer." Peter said, sipping his drink.  
  
"Once a coward, always a coward. Sticking with the safe and predictable course. No wonder you'll never get anywhere in your life." Severus said.  
  
"I can act spontaneously sometimes. Like the time I charmed you and Rebecca Wilkes's shoes to make you do the Tango in the great hall." Peter said, grinning over at Severus, suppressing a laugh.  
  
"That was not funny!!!" Snape said indignantly, almost falling off his barstool. Regaining his balance and composure, he said. "Besides, based on the detentions McGonagall gave out, I thought it was actually Black's idea."  
  
"James's actually." Peter whispered into his butterbeer.  
  
"Doesn't matter." Snape said. This conversation was actually doing wonders for him. Despite how awful his school days had been, concentrating his mind on Pettigrew was making him feel more himself than he had in years. "You can't do anything without your friends leading you into it. You'll always be that little boy who hung out with Potter and Black."  
  
"I know." Peter said hesitantly. then said suddenly, "I recently had an offer, though, that promises to let me distinguish myself though, its just I'm not sure I should take it."  
  
"And you turn to me for advice?" Snape said surprised, "I'm not particularly good at making choices."  
  
"I don't feel I can really talk to anyone else about it, and it has been bothering me for quite a while." Peter said.  
  
"Why should it bother you?" Snape said.  
  
"It's just that, if I take it, it seems that I will be betraying everyone who cares about me." Peter said, "But it holds a lot of promise."  
  
"So what is the job? Something in a foreign country and your afraid that you'll be deserting your friends in their fight? Or a deal with some shady wizards? Or is it something else entirely?" Snape said with a curious look at his companion.  
  
Peter thought a while, then decided that he really didn't want Snape to know about his conversations with the death eaters. He had never trusted Snape and wasn't about to start now. "Yes. Yes, like you said. It just makes me feel a little like a traitor."  
  
"You know, that is not always a bad word." Snape said, then drunk his shot of whiskey.  
  
"Not from what I've been told." Peter said.  
  
"Come now, are you so loyal as to let people stop you from realizing your true potential? Are you so loyal that you would continue living the way you hate, just for your friends? Or do something you'll regret? If your friends jumped off a bridge, would you do it too?" Snape said.  
  
At this Peter laughed unexpectedly. "What's so funny?" Snape said.  
  
"I was just remembering the time me, Sirius, James and Remus.um. jumped off a bridge to test the effects of a flotation charm." Peter said.  
  
At this Snape shook his head. "There is no point in being loyal if it means doing the wrong thing."  
  
"The wrong thing, huh Snape, so you're finally gaining some scruples." Peter said.  
  
"Something against your own best interest is what I meant." Snape said hastily.  
  
"Does somebody have a guilty conscience? I thought that didn't exist if I recall correctly." Peter said.  
  
"We all judge wrongly sometimes." Snape whispered.  
  
"So Severus Snape is human, after all. If I told Sirius, James or even Remus, about this conversation they would never believe me." Peter said smiling. "Would you mind telling me about it?"  
  
For a second, Snape thought that perhaps it would be safe to tell Pettigrew all his worries and regrets, but then thought better of it. The man would probably turn him in anyway. He was not going to let anyone but himself do that. Snape shook his head slightly. Where had that come from. He wasn't going to give himself up, they had to catch him first.  
  
"No, I'd rather not." And then he asked for his bill and got up to leave. Before he walked out of the door, he turned around and said, "Peter, don't do anything you'll regret."  
  
Peter sat there, and finished his butterbeer, then decided he had better order something a little stronger. 


	3. Who can you trust?

On Loyalty  
  
Part 3: Who can you trust?  
  
"Wormtail," a voice that had become all too familiar to Peter Pettigrew's ears bellowed to him. He felt his stomach turn upside down and he wanted to flee, but it never did one good to defy Voldemort. He ran into the chambers and bowed before his master.  
  
"Yes, my Lord."  
  
"Wormtail," Voldemort said, twirling his wand in his long thin fingers, "I want you to go to our prisoner and give him his daily cursing."  
  
"Yes, my Lord," Peter gulped.  
  
"See if you can get the stupid wretch to talk today, we need to know what Dumbledore knows."  
  
"Yes, my Lord," Peter said than slowly backed out of the room and into the hallway where he promptly started running to the basement, where Severus Snape was being held.  
  
***  
  
Severus Snape sat on the cold floor staring at the ceiling. Ten days. Ten days since the Death Eaters had taken him to this dingy basement. Ten days chained to the wall. Ten days without food or drink, surviving only by catching the moisture of the leaking ceiling. Ten days of continual Cruciatus. He was beginning to think he wouldn't make it to eleven days. The door opened and the dim candlelight of the hallway burnt his eyes. The door closed again, and Snape could make out the chubby shape of Peter Pettigrew.  
  
"Hello, Snape," Pettigrew said in a smug voice. "Don't you have anything to say to an old friend?"  
  
Severus glared at him and spat, "We were never friends."  
  
"Come now, we only tease the ones we love," Pettigrew mocked him.  
  
"You and I both know that love is an illusion," Severus replied with some of the little strength he had left.  
  
"Don't try to snare me into another one of these talks Snape," Pettigrew yelled at him. "Crucio"  
  
Snape tensed up, his nerves screaming in pain. Eventually Pettigrew released the curse. "Tell me what Dumbledore is planning."  
  
Snape just looked at him that would send even the most seasoned seventh years running for their mothers.  
  
"Stop these stupid games! This isn't like twenty years ago, we aren't schoolboys and you don't frighten me!" Pettigrew yelled at Snape, then kicked him in the stomach.  
  
"No, it isn't like twenty years ago," Snape responded. "Twenty years ago any one who said you would be torturing me would have been laughed off the face of the planet."  
  
"Funny how fate plays tricks on us." Peter responded.  
  
"If you are trying to tell me that you believe it was your fate to be here today, you are an even bigger idiot than I thought you were," Snape leered.  
  
"No, no, it wasn't fate. Voldemort has made me more powerful then I could ever be helping Dumbledore, intelligent self-interest, like you said oh so long ago," Peter answered.  
  
"And more miserable."  
  
"Crucio," Peter yelled at the captive, "This is not the time for small talk, what is Dumbledore planning."  
  
Once again Snape remained silent.  
  
"Come on, Severus. You must realize that it is not in your interest to keep quiet. You're near death and Dumbledore can't save you. But if you tell us, I'll give you a nice large goblet of water and some bread. Don't you want to live?"  
  
Severus thought of bread and his stomach growled, and he licked his lips at the thought of water and almost broke. But then he shook himself out of his thoughts. "I would rather die than betray Dumbledore's trust."  
  
"Ah, but isn't trust another one of your illusions? Doesn't it only serve to blind you to the people who will stab you in the back? Say nasty things about you behind your back, steal from you, constrain you and expect you to be what you aren't." Peter seemed to stop talking to the other mind as if this statement were intended for another, unseen, audience.  
  
"Of course, trust may be an illusion. But, you have to trust something or nothing will ever make sense, nothing will ever be solid. You just have to trust those who are worthy of it, and I'm afraid you have made the unfortunate mistake of trusting Voldemort." Snape was getting desperate, but he figured it was better to keep Pettigrew talking than to suffer another bout of cursing or to be left alone to die.  
  
"Who said I trusted him?" Peter responded.  
  
"You seem to be under the delusion that you will live much longer than me, but I have seen the way he leers at you, the disdain he feels for your groveling. If you tell him I'm dead and you haven't got any information to show for it…"  
  
"He wouldn't!" Pettigrew yelled. "My Master needs me, trusts me…" Peter's face went completely blank and he looked like he was about to faint. "Oh, my God. Oh, my God!!! What am I going to do?! Talk you piece of shit." Pettigrew grabbed Snape's robes with his silver hand and lifted Snape's face up to his then slapped him.  
  
Snape struggled to get up for a while, then somehow managed to position himself in a seated posture. "I already told you I won't tell you anything," he smirked.  
  
"YES YOU WILL," Peter yelled, "Crucio!"  
  
After the curse was again lifted, Snape whispered, "No, I won't."  
  
"Crucio! Yes you will, if it is the last thing you do." Peter replied.  
  
"No. I won't, even if it is the last thing I fail to do. You're energy would be better directed to figuring out how to save yourself from the 'Avada Kedavra' you know is coming."  
  
"You know, everything you do only serves to make my life worse! At school, at that bar, and now you are just going to get me killed you bastard!"  
  
"Peter, you don't have to go back to Voldemort." Snape said.  
  
"Oh, yes, and what do you know about what I have and don't have to do. If I don't stay with Voldemort, Sirius'll kill me." Peter said.  
  
"Voldemort will kill you before Black will ever set eyes on you again." Snape replied.  
  
"But, the Dementers, and the Aurors, they have all got it in for me."  
  
"If you can get me out of here, I'll make sure Black doesn't kill you and I'll try my hardest to keep you from the ministry."  
  
For the first time in many years Peter's eyes shone with a glimmer of hope. "Really."  
  
"Really."  
  
"And why should I trust Severus Snape the Slytherin Snake." Peter said, his voice shaking with doubt. "How do I know you won't turn me in the minute you get back?"  
  
"You don't, but there is no one else to trust." Snape said, then finally collapsed from the strain of the conversation. Peter walked up to Snape and felt for a pulse. It was there but rather faint. He took out his wand, stared at Snape, stared at the chains, and then stared back at the door.  
  
  
  
  
  
AN: So what does Peter do? Will he save Snape? Will Snape save him? Well, I won't tell you because I'm evil and lazy. Evil because I think it is batter for you to draw your own conclusions, and lazy because if I wrote what happens, I'd have to write more. But even if I don't tell you, you can tell me so please review with your thoughts. Thank you to Amanda Swiftgood (you know, there really should be more between these two, if I didn't I wouldn't write this, but there are those who still do not give Snape a third dimension as well as a large number who see nothing in Wormtail), Tia'Ru'Hia, Lunadaisy, Radka, Demeter, Lady Feylene (slashing them??? I guess I don't write slash because I agree with the people who say that most slash does a bad job describing gay romance and I know that I couldn't do a good job with any romance. If you want to base slash off this pair or even this story, go ahead), and Memento Mori (who I am again going to tell to read the books, even if someone will have to go through them and give her the pages of all the Snape/Voldemort/Pettigrew scenes because she doesn't want to read trio, or do you?) 


End file.
